I’ve been presented with an opportunity to move to Eastern Tennessee or Texas. I don’t know where to fucking go, though, because both places are hot as hades in summer and all my fat rolls will get sticky with sweat.
Atlanta is already hot as balls. For real, have you been here? It’s like living in the hottest, moistest, most humid vagina ever.
Yeah, the heat is getting to me. Also, I’m still trying to figure out how I found a guy without a whole set of teeth attractive.
So where do you live? Do you recommend either of these places?
- “Liquor sex and books, that’s that don draper diet
Are you sure you’re not a 1960s businessman?”
- “Do you have any grey poupon? :-D”
- “I need a big sexy girl who loves her ass to be eaten and stuffed”
- “I have an eight inch tongue and I breath through my ears! Best pickup line ever!”
- “I need to get my paws on your sexy ass”
- “Hey,I really want to make out with you…
- “You know, Dr. Phil says I’m afraid of commitment… Want to help prove him wrong?”
- “Liquor?? I hardly know her!”
- “Hey wanna get drunk and hookup”
- “Hello Beautiful, I want to kiss every inch of your body”
Let me restate this….all of these messages are from men messaging me for the FIRST TIME. No prior contact.