Shit Men Say Issue 5

Oh, man. I have some fun ones this issue!!

  1. “I won’t you to myself”–I replied to this one. I’ll keep everyone updated.
  2. “Just thought I’d say hi and see if you’d like to talk sometime or if you’re ever in the market for a tattoo let me know”—interesting place to advertising your tattooing skills. Not sure I trust it.
  3. “How often do you like to show off what you have? I would love to see it up close and extremely personal!”–is he a gynecologist?
  4. “Hey sext”–do you think he meant sexy? And my beauty just overwhelmed him where he made a typo?
  5. “Your very beautiful”–how hard is the your/you’re thing!?
  6. “i wanna cum for you”–thanks?
  7. “I want to see you”–open your eyes?
  8. “Be even sexier if you opened them legs in that dress.”–seems like a good idea for a profile pic.
  9. “I love your beautiful smile.”–ummm my pic is of my legs?
  10. “Beard ride?”–not without seeing the beard, Justin.

Spelling mistakes are such a turn off. What are your turn offs?

Shit Men Say Issue 4

Sorry I’ve been absent! I plan on blogging more. I miss chatting with my online friends! Anyways, it’s time for some more of Shit Men Say.

  1. “I will be arriving in Atlanta tonight at around 8 or 9 p.m., and I am looking for someone to host me for the night. I’m really laid-back, fun, and entertaining, but I also have a wild side, as well. 🙂 would you be willing to let me stay with you for the night?”–got this on OkCupid. Ummm…like I don’t know you, potential serial killer. I might fuck you in a hotel room, but no, you can’t come to my house.
  2. “You have a beautiful complexion. It’s is like the whitest snow and spotless.”–got this from my legs, did you? Seems like he wants to wear my skin or something, Pass!
  3. “Hello my name is sarah i want to be your friend. Text me OK”–Ok, this one isn’t male, but it’s odd. Text her, but no number? Why you on a dating site looking for friends, Sarah?
  4. ” I have magic hands and a bionic tongue.”—Suuuure you do.
  5. “Only in Atlanta.”–Umm…what’s only in Atlanta?
  6. “I have something stiff and hard for you. No woman can give you that. Maybe something fake but mine is real!”–Dying laughing.
  7. “How ate you today? My name os James.” —I an fin. Thinks for asing.
  8. “you’re nice buxom babe.. with nice butt.. smooth legs and may be great boobs too .. or may be it’s all my imagination :)”–got all this from a picture of my legs, huh? Witch!
  9. “I’m horny.”–Hi, Horny. I’m Felicity. Nice to meet you.
  10. “maybe we could explore curves with few stop signs”–what?

That’s all for this edition. There will be more, I promise.

Who is better in bed: older or younger men?

It’s an age old question, but I want to know your answer…is a younger man or an older man better in bed?

On one hand, the younger men are like fucking sex energizer bunnies. They go and go and go.

But on the other hand, older men know what the fuck they’re doing.

Now, I could be in the minority, but every man I’ve fucked under 30 doesn’t know how to make me orgasm without guided direction. They just don’t. Maybe they’re selfish, maybe they’re inexperienced, or maybe they’re fucking stupid. I don’t know.

But recently, I went home with a man 15 years my senior. I’ve never had sex with anyone more than 3 years older, so this was new for me. The salt and pepper look? Hot.

This man knew how to work a vagina. His fingers moved over my clit so swiftly I was orgasming before I realized what happened. He kissed me so passionately my panties were soaked within minutes. He finished me off FIVE times.

Five. Times.

After, I couldn’t move. My legs and body were singing in pleasure and I may have passed out briefly. It was amazing. I will definitely be going back for more.